Dating your husband and fostering your own interests as a mother
People closest to me know my idea of relaxation is being active outdoors. Given the choice between doing anything else, I will always choose to be outside. It is not that I am a fitness fanatic rather I gain strength from fresh air and beautiful surroundings. I love a long walk with a friend, a solo run, camping, and kayaking. Once our son was born and my free time was heavily diminished I quickly realized whenever Jasper spent the night at my parent's I always preferred a restless night under the stars over a good night's rest in my own bed. Although intuitively this did not make much sense, the time spent together devoid of all other distractions strengthened my marriage and in turn my ability to be an even better mother. When you have something good in your life it is important to both nurture it and share it with others. My husband and my children are the greatest blessings in my life and both relationships need to be fostered and cared for.
Something I realized very early on as a mother is the time I spend away from my child is as important as the time I spend with my child. As a mother who works from home I often missed out on the powerful and restorative feeling of missing my child. Jasper is typically around me, climbing all over me and in my face most hours of the day. He both seeks and demands my undivided attention a majority of my day. On the other hand, my husband goes to work each day and experiences that daily emotion of missing our son. For me, it was important to occasionally experience those same feelings, so I could better relate to my husband and so I could be fully engaged when I am with my son. I am grateful for every second I am able to spend with my son, but I am also grateful for a network of people who love my son and allow me to retain my own sense of self. Before I had children I attend a dinner where we were asked to going around the table and talk about our hobbies. Two women I knew who happened to be mothers quickly stated they no longer had hobbies because they had children. In that moment, I made a promise to myself if I ever was fortunate enough to have children I would foster my own creativity and happiness with equal fervor. I can honestly say I wake up each morning feeling endless amounts of gratitude and love for this little person I get to call my own, but I am also grateful for those moments to myself and days where I get to go hiking with my husband knowing full well our son is having an equally epic time with Grandma and Grandpa.
